Wednesday, February 28, 2007
(Good segue huh? I've been a little slow in the photo department lately, and who doesn't love a blog with a spoiled dog in down coat with fake fur? I will admit however, there's something a little off with Kino in this photo. It creeps me out about 7%)
I came home from church one Sunday and was going to grill a hamburger out on our deck. (When I say deck, I really mean 4-story "balcony" over a ravine because our house was on a hill.) Unfortunately, being that it was Portland and all, it was pouring rain. And we have no cover on the deck.
I maneuvered myself in and out of the house multiple times, trying my hardest not to drip water all over the place. My final trip in, I had to empty my hands so I could close my umbrella. Erroneously, I put down the plate with my freshly grilled burger.
Kino, being the little conniving thief that he is, snatched the burger off my plate and ran away. I yelled in tandem at the dog and for my mom. She wrested the patty from Kino's unyielding mouth and rinsed it off in the sink.
I gave Kino a swift little, unseen kick and ate my burger.
Which is the strangest part of the story?
A) Like a cookie on TV, a perfect bite was taken from my burger.
B) I'm writing a blog that features a dog in human clothes.
C) I ate a burger that had literally been washed.
D) I readily admit to harming an animal.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
The time is now 3:41AM.
I'm awake at such an unholy hour because there is someone in our sunroom. Granted, my lights have been off since 1, but the sound of constant four-legged burrowing is enough to keep your adrenaline pumping and thoughts of sugar-plums far from your head.
Do you know that really great scene in the movie "The Power of One"? Where all the different tribes of imprisoned South Africans combine in a magnificent concert of syncopated chant, clap and song? It's one of my most moving scenes in cinema. But anyway, that's my heart right now. Crazy wild with thumping and movement. Luckily, the song of my heart won't get Morgan Freeman beat up and killed.
NONEtheLESS, there is a mouse scampering around not ten feet from where I sleep. I hope it's a mouse anyway and not a larger raccoon or muskrat. (Side Note: does Boston even HAVE these?).
Whoever or whatever he is, I have named him Gus-Gus. And in my mind, Gus-Gus the mouse is wearing a little vest and hat. And is actually a cartoon. I don't think cartoons can gnaw your face off in the dark.
And with that on my mind, I will once again try to find sleep.
Monday, February 26, 2007
An Oscar-winner, a Grammy-winner, and a Tony-winner all together in one 6-minute blow out!
Quite possibly the best moment of the Oscars. I love these ladies--and they freakin' brought the house down! Words can't describe how great this performance is.
Beyonce is beyond beautiful and I'm developing a healthy-sized (no pun intended) girl-crush on Jennifer Hudson. Can these girls wail or what?
Oscars last night were awesome!
Sunday, February 25, 2007
And I have Ashlee Simpson to thank.
"Pieces of Me" is a quasi-annoying, quasi-guilty pleasure song on the radio; karaoke-style borders more on the always-annoying, not-very pleasureful scale. Nonetheless, my pitch was pretty consistent and I knew all the words. Talk about embarrassing. Not exactly a song to brag about.
But a double-diamond platinum score is nothing to scoff at mind you. However...
Don't worry; I credit my win to the fact the song/singer weren't very good to start with. I tried Whitney's "The Greatest Love" later in the evening and my success was marginal compared to the primary "Pieces of Me."
Nonetheless, it's about time A. Simp got a little respect.
She has mine.
Friday, February 23, 2007
I'm about to become the happiest girl in the whole USA (shout out if you know the song!). Four very short, and very long, days from now, I will have broadcast and cable television reentered into my life.
I promised myself as soon as I secured a job that would pay the bills, I'd fulfill one of my greatest wishes, hopes, dreams, and desires and get cable with recording privlidges.
Scoff if you will. Jest if you must. I'm not a TV addict; I like the shows I like and religiously keep up on them. Just in case you were wondering, these shows are (in no particular order):
Friday Night Lights, The Office, Grey's Anatomy, and Veronica Mars. (And FYI, each of these websites has deleted scenes, extras, episode recaps, interviews, etc.)
That's it! My list is relatively short, but of course I can be convinced to watch many, many other shows. DVR/TiVo is about to make its inaugural appearance--and I just know we're going to have a fruitful relationship. Watching what I want, when I want... I think I'm in love.
One question for all my cable-savvy readers. Do any of you have ON DEMAND? If so, is it worth the extra $7.80/month?
And since my cable isn't getting installed until Tuesday, can I PUH-LEEZE watch the Oscars at someone's house on Sunday night?
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Will power, with the proper motivation, is completely within my grasp.
I'd like to formally announce my bid for the "We'll see if she's really got it" Will Power 2007 award. I've committed to running a half-marathon on May 12 with the group in my ward. Many of you will remember the fact that I hate running, and never considered myself a runner. I still don't--but maybe my desire to complete a half is me trying to prove I can do anything--even if I mostly hate it.
Is that self-deprecation at its finest? Doing something to spite yourself?
Annnnnnnnd... to make the row that much harder to hoe, I'm going to give up donuts for lent. Will my life be worth living the next three months? Only time will tell...
Regardless of the pain and "I do not want to go to the gym" attitude I'm sure to have, I'm actually quite excited.
What are you self-inflicting that's making your life hard but stretching your limits?
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
I have also, in previous posts, alluded to the giant ice storm us Bostonians have been digging out of for nearly a week. Skies have been clear this week but temperatures range in the -8 to 19 degree range, so the ice not only stays frozen, but freezes harder.
Yesterday, of all the days since the ice storm, being President's Day, the day we had to work... both the founders of our 10-employee company spent time at the ER. For individual slips on the ice. Different times, different places. One has a seriously sprained knee, the other had a collapsed lung. Both are in pain at home.
This morning we sat discussing this recent turn of events, and one of my designers spoke right up and said, "It's karma, I tell you what. They made us work yesterday, they paid the price."
Monday, February 19, 2007
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Really though, what kind of drugs do you think she's on? She was literally on top of the world... and now she's buzzing her own hair in some sloppy salon. Talk about a colossal meltdown! I can't even come up with the snarky commentary that this post obviously deserves. I'm just so shocked.
If Justin is bringing sexy back, maybe Britney is trying to bring the fe-mullet back.
Friday, February 16, 2007
Yes, my hair is golden rod. No, I'm not smoking a pipe. Yes, I'm actually wearing flats in snow. I'm nutty like that.
(The traction isn't very good though. I would have fallen straight down our outside stairs this morning if I hadn't grabbed onto the rail like my life depended on it. Sigh. Two falls in two days. I'm on to some kind of record or something.)
And this is a winter get-up since it's -11 outside right now. I'm one of the lucky ones whose car wasn't stuck to the road. Maybe tomorrow it'll be in the 20's and we can turn our heat down.
Hope spring's eternal... (did you catch the double meaning?)
Thursday, February 15, 2007
I fell down for the first time ever due to weather conditions.
Seven winters in Utah and I never slipped in ice or snow once. Not once! But it snowed eight inches in Boston yesterday and rained all afternoon. The Waterworld that was our yesterday afternoon became Ice Age this morning.
Luckily, no one saw.
Unluckily, the unopened Diet Pepsi I had in my hand (for a little afternoon pick-me-up) hit the solid ice pack and burst at the seams.
Today was then a sad day.
I miss you ever so much. It's my fourth day on the job, and I've been asked to fine-tooth comb an entire corporate website (or is it Web site?) for error. We have no copywriter on staff, and I must have up-sold my writing/editing abilities in my initial job interview.
I'm in trouble. I relied on you, as my distinguished copywriters to be perfect; and you were. Are. Just not for me any more.
I miss our LOOPs. I miss compiling the changes you grammar/spelling/formatting-Nazis pounced on with unprecedented speed and ability.
Now I'm having to do it myself in a higher-stakes arena. And the copy that's supposed to be going live tomorrow would make you shudder. Take this for example:
"Not connecting with your prospects on the phone is a roadblock to building a great pipeline. " or "In addition to live leads, you will be able choose as many zip codes that you want to source an additional ten leads per month. "
You non-copywriters may or may not notice when the grammar, voice, or flow of a sentence is in dire need of a rewrite. Apparently no one here did either. I will begin the pleading to add a copywriter to staff.
I'm glad we have IM because I might be harassing you constantly--David experienced it already this morning.
I took you for granted before when I should have been thanking you profusely. Do any of you want to move to Boston?
With belated thanks and appreciation,
In missing you ever so much,
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Take with a grain of salt; I actually really love Valentine's Day. Not just a day for sweethearts, but to express appreciation for everyone important in your life.
So, you'd expect a typical homemade Valentine to look something like these:
For the recently broken up:
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Hot! Rob Lowe, Matt Dillon, Patrick Swayze, Emilio Estevez, Ralph Macchio (The Karate Kid!), Tom Cruise, Diane Lane... this movie is packed with superstars! The acting is quasi-B rate; but it's as Kelly (The Office would say), totally awesome. The specials on the DVD featured the casting tapes of the then 16 and 17 year old boys. Fantastic.
This movie really is a classic. How could a movie with the tagline They grew up on the outside of society. They weren't looking for a fight. They were looking to belong not be fantastic? I dare you to watch it.
Then, let's rumble.
Monday, February 12, 2007
Why aren't you at work Nat!? Exactly. It's now 9:31 and I'm still in my car in the parking lot. Happy Monday, the doors to my new suite are locked and the lights off. Guess we roll a little later on Mondays. Great news for anything but your first day.
So what would you do? I don't think the Monster Career section prepared me for this... Methinks only one thing is appropriate--and it rhymes with shmonuts!
Friday, February 09, 2007
1. I burned through a solid chunk of my anytime minutes telling my mom, dad, sister, grandma, aunt, and anyone else who wanted to listen about the good news. You'd think I was Italian with all this familial involvement.
2. My roommate Cheryl and her fiancee William took me to the Cheesecake Factory for dinner last night. There, I overindulged on Diet Cherry Coke, Chicken somethingorother, potatoes, broccoli, and a ginormous piece of carrot cake to go.
3. Celebration commenced at the house where Marie, Preston, Kylee, Tim, and Jared had just arrived. We decided to watch a movie.
4. Spontaneous dancing ensued after the movie. (I guess it was Step Up! so what can you expect?)
5. Arriving home at 1AM, I decided to give one of my besties Stephanie a call. Somehow we filled 2.5 hours of conversation. I guess that shouldn't be so surprising since I used to talk to that girl an hour or more at work everyday.
6. THEN, (I know this is super exciting people, control your enthusiasm), I had to finish the book I was reading Judge and Jury by James Patterson. It's fantastic! And super scary to be reading about an Italian mobster on the loose at 5AM.
By the time I was done, the time was 6:04AM EST. The neighbor's car was on warming up, Cheryl was waking up to go to the gym, and the sky was getting light. No regrets from me though, proving I could spend my last free "I should have a job and be going there in the morning, gosh it's too late" night guilty-free.
My eyes opened at 12:17 PM EST and I celebrated by eating the giant piece of carrot cake and having a Diet Pepsi. In fact, I'm quite ready for another. Think I'll grab my next book and plop back into my bed while it's warm.
Thursday, February 08, 2007
In celebration of my new job, I might have gone a little overboard. I had a chocolate-frosted donut (no big surprise), chocolate milk, and a bagel with cream cheese. Employed-people's carbs don't count.
So people, today is a day of celebration. Why? Nat got her donut back.
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
For example, take my profile picture. Here is a high-level view of the mosiac:
I'm really lucky because the 450 photos from my family Thanksgiving shoot are all in the right flesh toned colors... but I've been amazed how accurate each of the mosiacs I build are. A shout out to Joe (if he's reading) for cluing me into this time-sucker. And I'm back on board with computers--they're pretty amazing things!
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Like today. Dressed in my interview suit and on my way out the door, the Internet gives up the ghost and refuses to work. Nevermind the fact my signal strength is "excellent." Curse you Internet, you are any thing but excellent and I don't have MapQuested directions to my 4:00 interview.
Panic begins to set in until I realize I actually own a map. And not just any map, but a Metro Boston and suburbs street by street map. I will navigate my own way to Interview #46.
And navigate I did.
The Internet is a crutch I willingly, obsessively, compulsively, and consistently use for life's simplest tasks. However, in the face of my own panicky, anxiety-laden almost-meltdown, it's nice to know I have non-cyber skills still guiding my life.
Take that you crappy Internet.
In case you're interested, this is the route I navigated with my old school skills.
#1. Go to the gym.
#2 Go to the grocery store.
I may have got lost, and drove around and around the same area of Cambridge looking for a Gold's, but it was fantastically thrilling and I loved it. It's not every day you're lost by MIT and dodging some of the world's smartest geeky pedestrians.
Then, I spent the majority of the evening making snarky Valentine's Day cards from construction paper. I'd post the photos here, but those same valentines are being used and I don't want to ruin the surprise. Trust me, they're worth the wait.
I started watching "Walk the Line" last night and remembered why I'm in love with Reese Witherspoon. I literally focus on only her any time she's on the screen.
And lastly... did you see photos of that hundred pound tumor they removed from some lady? Wow! Coolest thing I saw today. The best part? Her primary care doctor just told her she needed to lose weight... Oh boy.
Saturday, February 03, 2007
1. I have a hard time deciding how to start any of the things I write. The first is so important because it hooks the reader!
2. I only succeed at being interesting half the time.
3. I have three gorgeous sisters—Alaina, Kendall, and Mallory. I don't think any of us look that similar.
4. Born and raised in Tempe, Arizona.
5. I finished high school at Marcos de Niza in three years.
6. It took me five years to get out of BYU.
7. I named our dog Kino after our favorite vacation spot in Kino Bay, Mexico.
8. I suggested the winning name for my only/cutest niece Adrienne, called Adrie.
9. At three years old, I split my head open—I’ve got the scar to prove it.
10. Speaking of splitting things open, I jumped off the diving board and instead of landing in the pool, my chin landed on the decking. Split.
11. I broke my left arm roller-skating.
12. I broke my right arm falling off the monkey bars at home. The babysitter called 911, and the firetruck came to my house.
13. I’m obsessed with throwing parties or events. Disco Birthday Skate, Sugar House High Prom, the Jazz Party, etc.
14. My hair is the longest it’s ever been.
15. I wish it were dark and curly.
16. One of my guiltiest pleasures is the movie “High School Musical.” I might own the soundtrack as well.
17. Somehow I owe money this year for my taxes despite having the same withholdings as last year. Bah!
18. I love Skittles more than anyone else on the face of the planet.
19. You’d be amazed by how much I can drink in one sitting—when we go out I usually have at least six Cherry Cokes.
20. I have more STUFF than anyone you can imagine.
21. Besides one box at my parents, all that STUFF is here with me in Boston.
22. It’s a good thing I have a very large room.
23. I can say all 50 states in alphabetical order in sixteen seconds.
24. I love love love trivia games.
25. My two front teeth are only partially mine. The trampoline claimed the other halves.
26. One of my favorite things to do is eat out with friends or family. Nothing like enjoying great food with good conversation.
27. I hate Cameron Diaz.
28. I do not touch or eat butter. In fact, I call it the silent killer, and it sicks me out.
29. My favorite album of all time is Counting Crows, “August and Everything After.”
30. I’m still a little broken up about Reese and Ryan’s breakup.
31. I quit scrapbooking after only two years, so I have tons and tons of that crap…
32. …but I love to make Thank You and Birthday cards, so I guess it all works out.
33. My license doesn’t expire until 2047, and I look exactly 12 years old.
34. The smell of hard-boiled eggs about puts me over the top.
35. I know how to bake two things—cinnamon rolls and French silk pie. That’s it folks.
36. I’m obsessed with reading other people’s blogs. I wish yall would update more.
37. If I could have any job in the world, I’d be an entertainment columnist.
38. When I’m reading trashy celebrity news blogs, I always skip the posts about Pete Doherty, Paris Hilton, and Denise Richards.
39. I love cinnamon-flavored candies. Hot Tamales, cinnamon bears…
40. I LOVE LOVE LOVE reality-based competition shows.
41. I’m a chronic nail biter/peeler.
42. The hearing in my left ear is bad, so I usually sit with my right ear cocked forward.
43. This is also why I say, “I’m sorry, what?” after everything.
44. And why I run into a lot of corners and walls; my balance is off.
45. I need a passport.
46. My smile turns downward. Strange, but true. And I don't know how to explain it any better because you'd think it would be a frown, but it's not!
47. My PC has 13,000 photos on it so I get sucked into watching my screen saver of random photos all the time.
48. I could (and have been) lay in bed all day and read.
49. I read books for the escapism mainly, so I don’t hit the books with deep ideas or current events. Callous as it may be, I read for entertainment.
50. I split my reading time 40% slice-em-dice-em killer books, 30% chick lit, 30% books that have been made into movies.
51. I love playing “Would You Rather” or rank-ordering things.
52. For some unexplained reason, I really love Jennifer Lopez. Not with Ben Aff, but just in general. I think she’s beautiful.
53. Pam and Jim should just put us out of our misery and get together. Three seasons now!
54. I tried to download the Office theme song as a ring tone yesterday, but it’s not compatible with my phone. Blast!
55. I know slim to nothing about art, and sometimes I kind of wish I knew more.
56. However, I do know a little bit about everything—it’s mostly useless information, but I can fake it til I make it.
57. I can do anything on the Internet.
58. I’m a deal-finder, bargain-hunter/shopper to the miz-ax.
59. I LOVE seeing movies I’ve never seen before.
60. I’ve subscribed to Entertainment Weekly for the last four years and look forward to reading it every Saturday.
61. I always, always start 4/5 of the way through, on the Funniest Quotes on TV page. Why? Not sure.
62. I love when I hear a song and it totally reminds me of someone. For example, this JoJo song just came up on my playlist, and it made me think of Melissa.
63. When I have MTV, I get majorly sucked into the Road Rules/Real World challenges and the other semi-smutty reality programming.
64. I adore awards shows… before, during, and the chit-chat with friends after about the results and fashion.
65. I can’t help that I love basically all kinds of fast food.
66. I’m learning to cook here in Boston because there’s no where to just “grab” something and go.
67. I haven’t run one time since our 6k on Thanksgiving, but I’m beginning to think I’d like to run a 10k or a half. We’ll see.
68. I love to dance with my girlfriends—wow. This should be higher on the list.
69. I love TV on DVD.
70. Veronica Mars is a show that everyone should get hooked on.
71. My sister Mallory plays rugby and is a superstar on her nationally ranked team. Funny considering she’s the mellowest of the Williams’ girls.
72. Kendall’s sense of humor is the most like mine.
73. My favorite restaurant is the Texas Roadhouse. What joy to discover Boston has 5 of them.
74. Once, Krista and I hid the book “Hop on Pop” in our roommate’s backpack at the library. We left, and the security alarms went off. We waited for her and started chanting, “Hop on Pop! Hop on Pop!” when she walked out.
75. I wear glasses. Surprise!
76. I have a queen bed but lie perfectly straight quite close to the edge and never toss or turn during the night.
77. I always smile with my tongue underneath my two front teeth. I can’t help it.
78. I don’t swim.
79. In the summer, I get a little obsessed with the show “So You Think You Can Dance?”
80. I have a really good sense of direction and remember how to get places.
81. Whenever I deep clean my room I get so annoyed at how many bobby-pins I find. Where are they when I need them most!?
82. My sister Alaina is a supermom!
83. I looooooooove getting email.
84. I am worlds different than I was in high school.
85. I always have a song stuck in my head and I’m usually singing, humming, or whistling it under my breath.
86. I am a city girl—I would always like to live in or very close to one.
87. When I’m sitting at a computer, I can only handle having windows open that I’m absolutely using. The less the better.
88. I love the thrill of being in New York City.
89. I love Broadway shows and songs.
90. My dad and his brother married my mom and her sister. Therefore, I have an extra three sisters and one brother from different parents. Genetically, we’re all the same.
91. My grandparents are some of my best friends—dropping in on them was one of my favorite parts of living in Salt Lake.
92. I volunteered for the 2002 Winter Olympic Games and drove a 15-passenger van and went to a ton of events. I then sold all my gear for $700 on eBay. Thank you.
93. I love attending sporting events. I’m looking forward to some Red SoX games.
94. I’m not afraid or too cool to listen to music on the radio.
95. I have a really great relationship with both of my parents.
96. I’ve moved into the ideal situation in Boston!
97. I have zero regrets in leaving.
98. I love food too much to be healthy.
99. I love my life of staying home unemployed in my pajamas, not having to worry about weather conditions, showering, working, or anything really!
100. The people in my life mean more to me than any of my STUFF ever could.
101. I usually write more than I should.
Friday, February 02, 2007
The Bridezilla Wig-Out is fake.
The light bright bombs in Boston are fake.
I'm getting sick of being duped about things I really care about. (Yes, I got sucked into the Bridezilla hoax and was interested in the blinky bombs.) Why can't everyone discover Cameron Diaz is a hoax; that she's not really an A-List Celebrity? I'd be happily duped about something I actually believe to be true.
What else would you be happy to know you were duped about? (Ahhh! Ugly sentence.)
Thursday, February 01, 2007
And as I was driving home from my second interview of the day, I heard a new song by two of my favorite gangster teenagers--Bow Wow and Chris Brown entitled "Shortie Like Mine."
I had a pretty good idea what a "Shortie" is but even still, I wandered over to one of my new favorite websites, UrbanDictionary.com. (This is where I break out of my square box and learn real-world terms.)
shortie - n. Term of endearment, primarily for females.
Example: "How's it goin', shortie?"
(This was the cleanest, most family-appropriate definition I could find.)
Henceforth, you may refer to this blogging female as Shortie. Because being the very tall, very blonde, very white girl that I am, I like to confuse people.
And to tie both very unrelated ideas in this post together, I will give my own sentence illustration of the use Shortie.
"When she finally finds a way to pay them bills foo, Shortie goin'ta eat dat donit."